Caesar was laid to rest on Thursday night. It was only really decided that day, but we knew the time was coming. That afternoon I spent a few hours just watching him sleep. I can honestly say I have never cried so much in my life. The other 2 knew something was up, Alex hadn’t left his side since the day before and Anastasia was doing a great job of keeping him clean. Poor Calais was a bit like an awkward teenager, he wander the house, bored and lonely..no one wanted to play with him, and he had tried sitting with them a few times but just felt uncomfortable.

I have lost pets before, and have seen other animals put to sleep.. but never had to actually do it to one of our own..and certainly not one of our precious meezers. Nothing can really prepare you. Don’t get me wrong, I have loved all our special pets. But there is something indescribably special about meezer..for us. They literally are little 4 legged furry children.

Jake was a mess before we walked in there, I have never seen him like that before. One of us had to stay strong enough to speak to the vet. The vet was amazing, and explained everything well. I wasn’t too bad until the moment the needled went in and panic gripped me. I wanted to yell to stop and snatch him from them, before it was too late. But in a second he went limp, and was gone..forever. The enormity of that moment struck me I know we did the right thing, we owed it to him, but at the moment that barely helps to make it feel right

We took him home to Jake’s parents to bury him in the yard with many other pets gone by. We seem to be starting our own wing of the pet cemetary. Jake’s dog Shep was is buried here along with our first cat Winnie. We had to try and pick Caesar a spot that wasn’t too close to Winnie, he was never very fond of her..the feeling was mutual. Not sure they would be pleased having to spend forever so close to each other.

Caesar was the gentlest, most sweet natured boy. He was a mummies boy, but loved everyone. He nearly didn’t become part of our family tho. The first few days he was here, he was the most feral, nasty little thing you have ever seen. Hissing and attacking us if we went near him. I was ready to pack him up and take him back to the breeder! But on the 4th day, something happened and he woke up a completely different cat..it was amazing.

You never really think about this part when you are taking how your little drop dead cute bundled of meowing love, how painful it is as the other side.

We have been blow away by all the wonderful people who have stopped by to offer their sympathy, your words have really been a comfort over the last few days. I cannot thank you all enough But will offer some linky love to you all as a small gesture.

All our cat blogging friends, old and new..you guys rock! The last few months since Caesar became sick, we have been a bit quiet on the cat blogging front. Didn’t feel I could really blog happy posts and pictures of the cats..knowing what was coming. A special few of you have still continued visiting, thank you. I love sharing my furry family with you all, so I hope we can get back into it soon. Your words are very comforting, because I know a lot of your guys have been in my sad shoes, and you all know how special they are..not “just” a cat.

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But tonight we will stroke your fur and kiss your head one last time.

Words can’t express how much we will miss you sweet boy, we all love you so muchxx